The
Slightly eccentric A to Z blogging adventure of unknown and rather unpopular
Modern fairy tales
2013
s The Sultan of Salford
and the serpent
The
sultan of Salford had a serpent,
a large slippery scaly snake called
Sydney Sydney
would sit smilling and
Hisssssssing at the sultan’s servants which
was a bit scary for them, he
would also Hissssssssssss at the sultans
sister who said to the sultan that Sydney Sydney would sit
in the solarium sunning himself
and Hisssssssssing at the solarium staff
who would shuffle silently in
a state of shock
Then
one Sunday morning Simon the snake charmer arrived at the sultan’s salubrious suburban sanctuary, “I have heard tale of
a large sacred serpent smiling in
a sinister way” said Simon. “It’s in the summerhouse” shouted the servants
hoping that Simon the snake charmer was going to save them.
In
the summerhouse, Sydney
was stretched out in a sedan
Then
Simon saw a Slug and said “a slug”
and stabbed at it with a stick squashing it, Simon did not like slugs, and then as Simon sat
down again he squashed a salamander, then as he put his satchel down he squashed a stick
insect, He then squashed a spider as he was not keen on spiders either.
So Sydney slid sinuously round
Simon and said “You have squashed
some of my friends” as he squashed
Simon the snake charmer
who said “AAAAAuuuuuuuuuGGGGggghhhhhHHHH” a lot. But the Sultans sorcerer saw Sydney and shouted “Sydney stop it”, but Sydney said “He started it he Squashed
all these small creatures, it’s a
Scandal” So the Sultans sorcerer said a
secret spell “squishiousiosa supersyxlia alacazam”
and the Sparrow, slug, salamander, Stick insect and spider all appeared staring at Simon who was still
staggering about a bit. Simon
said he was very very very sorry
to squash them all and then set
off at some speed into the sunset never to be seen again, not entirely a surprise, but he never squashed anything small ever again.
The
Sultans sorcerer then said to Sydney Sydney
The End
.
This is great, loved the Dire Straits video.
ReplyDeleteYvonne.
Many thanks, the music is very diverse overall so I am not sure everyone will like everything.
DeletePoor Simon. He really should be more careful though.
ReplyDeleteI'm sure he will in future, I think he was being a bit too sure of himself as the great snake charmer when in fact Sydney is a charming Snake...
DeleteI bet when the serpent traveled in the sand he left tracks that looked like this:
ReplyDeleteS
S
S
S
S
S
S
And if he moved in his sleep then maybe:
Z
Z
Z
Z
Z
Z
If he had proper manners, then maybe:
(
)
(
)
(
)
Which leads up to my favorite joke:
What was that:
(
)
(
)
?????
I don't know, but there goes a whole flock of them!
)))))
(((((
)))))
(((((
NO! I am The Sultan of Swing
DeleteI like the flock joke Mr ESB it is very good. its a bit like the one you do with ones hand. . . . What is this. . . .A hand . . . . No its a dead one of these. I guess it does not work quite the same when no one can see the hand.
DeleteYou are The Sultan of Swing, I quite agree.
Yes! It is the eXact same joke slightly modified. I had neVer told it on a computer before. I painted for a while but it was totaLLy eXhausting because I had to use a 16 ft (5 meter) eXtension on my paint roller. I was un impressed with the coverage, I think I may try some sanding on it next time.
DeleteLove Dire Straits! Sultans of Swing might be one of my favorite one of their songs, next to Brothers in Arms. That and Skateaway. ;)
ReplyDelete--
Tim Brannan
The Other Side and The Witch
Red Sonja: She-Devil with a Sword
The Freedom of Nonbelief
AN interest bunch of blogs you are running there, I do wish you luck with that lot but you appear to be well in control of them. I must admit I sort of prefer my own kind of of fantasy, but we are all different, and so we should be.
DeleteI once played harmonica with Dire Straits but it was a long time ago indeed (a very long time ago).
Okay, I was going to leave a comment about he post. But you can't write, "I once played harmonica with Dire Straits" and not continue. :)
DeleteO yes I can . . . . . . :)
Delete