Sunday, 21 June 2015
A Fairy Tale about Politics and Pointy Sticks
A fairy tale
Once upon a time there was a princess who lived high in the mountains in a posh castle and did many things for the people of the kingdom, she was quite left wing which is rather unusual for a princess and she did many good deeds, like make sure all the children in the kingdom had school books and were looked after. Then one day the King (her father) increased the taxes and there was much grumbling and discontent. The princess was not happy, what with being a bit of a lefty and the like so went off to see the king in his private chambers.
Why have you put up the taxes she asked as she entered adding AND what is that THING?
AH yes its my new 58inch television with a 3d option and cinema quality surround sound . . . its well cool.
Well I hope you have not put up the taxes to pay for that monster of a television said the princess
MMMM well it was very expesive you know replied the king
A few days later when the princess was in town she met Mr Larkin the Butcher and she told him that her father (the King) had spent all the taxes on a huge new television. Mr Larkin was not happy and shouted leapt about and moaned and said he would lead the masses to form a free independent state. Then when she got home she told the King (her father) that she had told Mr Larkin all about the television and he was talking of forming an independent state. The King was not happy and he shouted leapt about and moaned, but he did then say he would reduce the taxes if it was making life difficult for folk and he was not keen on the idea of a folk forming a new independent state
The following day the princess went into town to tell Mr Larkin the good news because she was also not keen on the idea of independence either. Knocking on his door she got no response, but she could hear the voice of a man who sounded just like that Jeremy Clarkson chap from off the tele. Keen to pass on the good news to Mr Larkin she entered the house and found Mr Larkin sat in front of a new 58inch television with a 3D option and cinema quality surround sound.
AH he said I know I said times are hard but it is a very good television and I added a few pence onto the price of sausages so folk never noticed anyway.
As the princess left she met several of the local villagers and told them all about Mr Larkin (the leader of the Independent Movement) and how he had increased his prices to buy a huge new 58inch television with a 3D option and cinema quality surround sound, and they all shouted and leapt about.
As darkness fell that night there were folk shouting at Mr Larkin and folk shouting at the King and the King was shouting at Mr Larkin who was shouting at him and folk said it was all the princesses fault for being on the political left when she should know her place as one of the well off elite and that no good comes of trying to help folk. Some folk were still demanding independence and some wanted a 58inch television too.
Meanwhile the princess had gone into the forest to stab a pointy stick into a large wasps nest, she did this sometimes because she always said no one is perfect. As the wasps swarmed and flew about manically being grumpy and shouting she headed off home past all the grumpy folk shouting at each other and running about manically. Smiling to herself as she watched the fleeing massed crowds flapping their arms about and running as fast as they could from an angry swarm of wasps. The princess you see was a very good princess but she did have a bit of a devilish streak in her and could never resist prodding things with a pointy stick. Well we all like pointy sticks don’t we.