Tuesday, 21 April 2015

Roger (Rocket) Ravens . . . . The A to Z of Slightly Strange Unknown Victorian Inventors and Explorers

Roger (Rocket) Ravens

Roger or Rocket to everyone that knew him had one ambition in life and that was to be the first man on the moon and so he spent his life building the Ravens Rocket Mk1 in his garden in Port Talbot. The only town who would allow anyone to build and launch a sizeable rocket from a suburban back garden without a licence.  Making it the rocket capital of Europe for a short time until the local council truly understood the risks.

It took many years to complete but with the assistance of several eminent thinkers and engineers of the time including Marlin Mascots, Harrison Horsechestnut Hutt, Arnold Alexander Axle Armstrong-Atlas and Miss Yemiliano Yaragoza he did finally finish his rocket in 1869, and on July 20th set off on his greatest adventure destroying several houses and a cafĂ© on take off which did not go down well.  At this stage Mr Quinton Quantum-Quizzical said to the assembled press we know Roger (Rocket) Ravens is in his rocket but we do not know if he is alive or dead and therefore we have a paradox where both states can exist at the same time.

The trip lasted about 9 days in total and he successfully landed back in the Port Talbot  allotments, which did not go down well as it was reaching the point where the main harvest was due, and complains were made to the council.  The massed crowds were egger to see the large quantities of blue moon cheese they had heard of, but Roger (Rocket) Ravens only had a pile of grey rock. At this point folk lost interest as Port Talbot had lots of rock already and they did not really want more. And the hopes of selling Welsh rarebit made with moon cheese as a tourist attraction had now vanished into the dust (grey moon dust).

A few weeks later Roger discovered his rocket smashed up and in bits in his garden, an act of vandalism thought to have been undertaken by angry allotment holders. The local newspaper the Port Talbot Gazette proudly ran the main headline that night . . . . Who Killed Rogers Rocket. . . . A headline that has never been surpassed to this day by the local paper.

However  Roger (Rocket) Ravens was content knowing he was the first man to walk on the moon and that one day someone will find a Welsh flag with a large Welsh rarebit next to it (Rogers Rarebit  . . . . HA HAH AH ah ah ah ah ah hha ha ha ha ha haha ha ha).


  1. Hello Me how is it going.

    AH well its a bit quiet.

    Really I thought this A to Z was all go

    AH well I dont think folk like the Victorians


    Well they did go round the world making a bit of a mess of stuff.

    What like leaving their litter and messing up the politics of half the world.

    Something like that.

    Well it seems a bit hard to take it out on your little blog.

    Are you kidding, have you ever watched the voting on Eurovision

    OK point made. . . .

  2. Tis I! Late once again on account of PC troubles. *sigh*

    Hahahaha! Your comments to yourself are almost as amusing as your posts Mr Z. As you know Mr Z, the life of us eccentric British bloggers is a hard one. I think I shall write a normal blog from now on, about baking cookies and taking my child to sport's practice.

    In clips of the 1969 moon landings, you can clearly see in the reflection of Buzz Light-year and Louis Armstrong's (I think that was their names) visors, the Welsh flag, though it is never actually captured on camera. True fact.

    1. I think the Lil man is too curious about computers. I find not messing with them best and bearing in mind I do IT for a living (OK very part-time and for a very modest pay bearing in mind I work for a charity).

      Anyway my theory is dont mess with computers. I would make cookies except I am not good at that as for sports practice . . . . OOOOOOoooooooooooo NO.

      I think the Welsh flag was missed because the USA insisted on a Black and White landing on the moon. All a bit suspicious . . . .