Thursday, 25 December 2014

A Christmas Day Message not from the Queen

I seldom Write posts on Christmas Day but it is ten thirty in the evening all is quite and so I am reposting my diary entry from 2011. This means that some of what is below is not true and some is. Fundamentally I did not get the same presents I got new ones. . . .I am a lucky chap. As I have said many times the world is fickle there are things we can control and even more we cant, I hope you have all had a great day and that the year ahead will be good. I wish you all the very best and hope as always that folk learn to all live together even though I realise this is unlikely. . . .us humans are not all nice which is a damn shame, we are a conflict of human morality and the basic instincts of nature.  

So what did I write in 2011

Christmas day and a time of many things to many people. My good friend Captain Nessman will have been to mass and then out helping others and trying to do good deeds remembering his friends and family, a day of peace before battling the seven seas once more. We have had a quiet day at home opening presents and pottering about, and sending the odd message out wishing the world a Merry Christmas.

It has been a very chilled Christmas day which is great and I am very lucky to have an array of interesting presents from family and friends including my first mass market merchandising in the form of a badge, well several of them in fact from Miss Fionski the Famous Russian Spy proving the very point that thinking about presents means more than spending lots of money.

I also got some huge clawed hands that fit on my own hands so that I can pick up entire shrubs in the garden and put then in the expanding container supplied with them. I tried testing them on the cat but it ran away at the sight of two huge green claws approaching. I have also receiver books and CD’s (Steely Dan and Neil Young), posh shirts and posh chocolates and various items for the garden plus a weather vane for the roof (Well Cool). Yes I know what you are thinking “BUT YOU ARE AN ECCENTRIC CHILD NOT SOME GRUMPY OLD BLOKE” but I have loads of stuff and as my very good friend Captain Nessman would say Stuff does not bring happiness, OK I am happy and like stuff and have lots of it, but the twists and turns of life are fickle and we must remember such things and not take the good fortune we find ourselves in for granted. After all there are millions who have no control over their fate and have nothing or give up all to fight the greed and corruption of their leaders.

OK that’s it the end of this years Queens speech, Time for food and overindulgence after all I do live in the decadent west, although I don’t do sales so no boxing day sales for us. 


  1. A very merry (belated) Christmas to you and yours Rob not only for 2011 but 2014 as well.

    I have a pair of those green claw things for picking up leaves and they are awesome.
    I like to pretend I am a monster and chase the dog! hahaha
    Here is to a great 2015 with lots of fun, sunshine, NO WIND and no powercuts!
    (We are suffering with mini cuts this week - it's not good!)
    See you on the flip side!

    1. You should not get power cuts Mr H after all you are a power generator selling back to the grid, its like they are snubbing your good decent ECO electricity. Its not as if I have been poking at the wires with a pointy stick attached to an Owl to make its eyes light up. . . . . . . (OK a bit).

      Merry Christmas Mr H and you too have a grand 2015 and I hope you dont suffer from the wind either (AH that sounds a bit wrong somehow).

  2. Hurry! Only 364 shopping days til Christmas.

    I just made chili, buffalo & sausage.

    I am not sure I received a single present, so i got out the special watch I received from my older son several years ago and wore it aLL Christmas Day. I only wear it on special occasions.

    1. I am starting to think Easter Mr ESB before folk realise that Easter is now strategically placed between Christmas and next Christmas.

      I have a special watch but I bought it myself and it even tells the time correctly twice a day.

      No presents Mr ESB I'm not sure I can send a present back in time to Christmas Day, but I would if I could although I think for technical reasons it will need to be small.

  3. Arrrrrrgh! Blogger keeps eating my comments! As always, I just wrote the most hysterical sentence in the whole world of hysterical sentences. And now you shall never experience the joy that my written words would have had upon you Mr Z and for that, I humbly apologise.

    1. I entirely understand that; it has happened to me more that once and it always happens on the best writing. I suspect it is the work of God ensuring we do not get carried away by our own genius. He is just sort of saying. . . Oh Yes that's good but Hey I'm God so delete. . .

      But I know it was probably the best thing you have ever written that did not get wrote on the written page. . .