Friday, 5 September 2014

President Putin, NATO, Scottish Devolution, Spies and Ordinary folk

Yes sorry I have used an old favourite picture tonight

Well everyone . . . I spent the morning at the Village Hall Market, it’s a great market where everyone is happy and chilled we drink tea eat bacon butty’s and cake and catch up on local news. Now don’t go thinking O GOD NO LOCAL NEWS. . . no we are an interesting and cosmopolitan lot (I say lot but our numbers are few-ish) and so I was chatting to a chap who’s bride to be is a Russian woman and all was going well until a certain world leader said to his mates. . .Those Decadent Western puppets and their imperialist leaders are weak it is time to start retaking the empire. And besides, me and my comrades are very wealthy we can do what we like now. like fight bears, bARE chested . . . . . . . .  . . . HAHA HAH hah ah ah ah ahah Fight Bears, BARE chested . . . You are not laughing Igor I think it better if you do right away. . . . No I  insist. . . . .   

But events have lead to a cooling in Anglo-Russian diplomacy leading to difficulties if you are an Anglo-Russian couple hoping to marry and settle down in the rolling Shropshire hills of a tiny village.  Anyway the local chap said he knows a few people who know a few people and so he has pulled a few strings and managed to get a whole load of the Western Imperialist leaders together to have a chat and work out which one of them is going to be brave enough to go and see President Putin and explain to him that they are just a ordinary couple who what to drink tea, eat bacon butty’s and cake in the local Market on Friday Morning.  Not Spies with listening devices hidden in the wheels of wheelie bins outside the  secret NATO building hidden round the corner pretending to be a small holding, which in turn has bugging devices placed all over the Kremlin. . . . . . . Hang on it is probably best if I don’t mention that bit . . . . . . . AH DAMN.

Interestingly I note that the Western imperialist leaders say that the Ukraine, which was originally independent then sort of became part of Russian through force but decided to become independent should be left alone to make its own policies and decisions and the West and Russia should respect the views of the native Ukrainians. . . . . . . . Ooooooo it sounds just like Scottish Devolution . . . . sort of, but with less tartan.    


  1. Siting pretty in the hills and eating bacon butties in the market hall we watch what happens with a slight feeling of smug around the gills. Surely no baddies are ever going to get further than C>A>?

    What’s with the errant apostrophes? Deliberate?

    1. Sadly very little that happens on this blog is Deliberate it is a case of the quickness of the hands deceives the brain. Not so good when both are attached to the same body.

      is C>A> a bit like M&S. I feel their latest ad will leave folk disappointed once they get to the shop.

    2. I wonder if deliberate somewhat means un-liberate sometimes, especiaLLy if you're Putin-ing. We are having some nice September wet days but it is stiLL warm enough for the pineapples to be outside. It wiLL be a few more days until I have the great faLL roundup of 2014 and move them back inside to their winter pasture.

    3. Autumn has arrived here, apparently two weeks early officially

  2. It is more than a coincidence that my laptop broke at the EXACT SAME TIME those leaders were having cups of tea and posh bacon butties on the other side of the border.
    Was it the Russians? or the Americans? or even the Brits?
    Maybe the whole of NATO is against me? oh crumbs!

    1. Nato is a beast with many heads these days Mr H and beasts with many heads have a habit of becoming inert. So I suspect it is Just President Putin that is after you. . .

      So no need to panic. . . .

      When I say no need to panic I am lying a bit. . . OK I am lying rather a lot. . .