Thursday, 10 July 2014

2014 Brazilian World Cup The Final Conspiracy

I did not watch the world cup match between Argentina and the Netherlands last night as I was rather tired, but knew that my trusty Androids would easily defeat those Argentinians, after all, the German Androids had done the very same thing just the day before against Brazil. However I woke up to discover they had lost and on the penalty shootout. I then heard on the BBC News that the first two Androids asked to take penalties had panicked and said NO, unnerving the entire team. They have ruined my plans now and I will not be the ruler of the entire World forcing the very nice Steven Spielberg to make the blockbuster film of the book of the blog diary of me Rob Z Tobor.  I have since received a telegram from the very nice Steven Spielberg that read . . . . . . .  HAH AH AH AHAH AH AH AHHA HAHA HA HAH AH AHAHHAH AH Ha So I will not be making the film after all. Now I suggest you stop annoying me and go away. . HA HAHAH AH HAH AH HA HAH AH hah ah ah ah ah ha hah ahah hah aah ha hah  . . . . . . . . . . . .  Its OK I known he does not mean it and will come round to the idea very soon. 

I have realized though that the final is a fix, the Netherlands were doomed even with my Androids playing. You see the Germans as we all now know have been infiltrated by the Androids of the Knights Templar who are after the Holy Grail (world Cup). And as we all Know, who do they see as their head man, none other than the Pope and where does the present Pope come from, Argentina. Add to this the fact that the previous German Pope resigned to let the Present Argentinian  Pope take over in time for the world cup and we have one seriously big conspiracy theory, after all where is the one place on earth that you could hide the World Cup (Holy Grail). . . . . . . Yes the Vatican. No international police of any sort will get into there.

So it appears that the German team and the Argentinian  teams are in it together, I bet some of the Argentinian players are Androids of the Knights Templar and that would explain why my Dutch Androids were a bit off form.

However just so they know who the boss is I have reconfigured the two Androids who refused to take the first penalty for the Netherlands as a warning not to do such things again.    

OOooooooo and those compromising pictures of the Pope I planned to Blackmail the Argentinean Manager with were fakes planted by the Knights Templar to lull me into a false sense of security. They have turned out to be an Elvis Impersonator called Dave from Wolverhampton. . . .  Well He will have some explaining to do tomorrow to the press.

If Argentina win the World cup all I can say is it’s the hand of God and the whole match is rigged.  


  1. So wait. The World Cup is still going on?! I already moved on assuming the evil/benevolent/indifferent androids had won and taken over. I have been practicing kowtowing to metallic objects and sycophanting electronics. You mean there's a chance the humans may triumph?! Damnit! I'm going to have to reconsider my total lack of human contact.

    1. I think you may just need to avoid Popes and intelligent fridges and you will be OK-ish. I would also avoid smart phones. I do, the word smart sort of worries me a bit, its a phone why does it need to be smart I'm not and I get by OK

  2. I have just shown this to Henry Hut and he had this to say....

    "Good Grief Rob. We are kindred spirits sir. I had no idea that the world of football had become so infected with corruption.
    Luckily I know some people who might be able to help. They are a bit scary and odd, but I'm sure I smelled WD-40 on Mrs Featheringay the other day...."

    1. I think it is probably safe to say that the world of football has become infected with corruption. I can think of No One Better to turn too in this moment of crisis than Henry Hut himself.

      Lets just hope that the Commonwealth Games keep their gritty sense of British Fair Play where we all know its the taking part that counts and not the winning. . . Us Brits are good at taking part and not winning. I once nearly won, but luckily ran out of steam on the last lap and ended last and was cheered over the line before falling in a heap knackered.