Wednesday 29 January 2014

Of Mice and Men, Albatross and Puffins and Mr Putin



The other day I drew a picture of a mechanical Albatross in the style of Mr Leonardo di ser Piero da Vinci that could circumnavigate the entire world. At the time I suggested that it could be used by GCHQ here in Britain and NSA or the CIA in the USA to spy on folk. However these organisations have said that although the plan has merit the likes of President Putin is going to be rather suspicious if an Albatross is peering at him through the windows of the Kremlin as he talks to his generals. It appears Albatross do not sit on building in the middle of large cities watching the men and women of world power, so they said to me . . . . . .Rob you need to redesign that bird and maybe make it blend in a bit more with the environment it would be used in as a spy bird . . . . . . So I have thought long and hard about this and thought to myself, what would the great man Mr Leonardo di ser Piero da Vinci do. In a flash the answer was clear the perfect choice of bird, a bird no one would give a second glance at in Moscow or Pyongyang where they could almost sit on the shoulders of men as they discuss many secret things (that’s the men not the birds) . . . . . . . . . . . Yes you have guessed it the humble Puffin.

Anyway I sent my design off to GCHQ and NSA and before you could say  . . . . . the seagulls are holding the umbella in the park today . . . (a bit of spy talk) they have sent me a response saying . . . . . . .. . . ROB Z TOBOR you are an IDIOT. . .


Well there is no pleasing some folk, I understand how Mr Da Vinci felt now when he showed his drawing of his helicopter to the king.  

9 comments:

  1. I think your problem is you're going to the wrong people with your ideas. You need to find people who will appreciate your genius inventions, rather than people who just don't know a genius when they see one.

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    1. I feel the main problem with GCHQ and the NSA is that they are not really bird people they are still very attached to their BUGS . . . . . . .. HAH HAH AH HA HAH HAH HA HHHAH AH HAH AH HAH HAH ha ha ha ha ha ha ha

      Thank you very much Miss Laura for the subtle hint at genius, however I have been to the mirror to check and an ordinary sort of chap looked back at me who is starting to look old, confused and slightly battered........

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    2. As an espionage plus, birds eat bugs!

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  2. You need to tweak the albatross. Maybe that sounded rude. Now, make it have invisible powers and with that I shall now vanish....

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    1. Invisible powers are good but I cant draw them.

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  3. I don't find it odd that puffins are spying on world leaders. They, puffins not world leaders, are common in the desert southwest where I live. And by common I mean I've never seen one at all. I did see an Emu once. Nope, that was a tumble weed. Which bore a remarkable resemblance to a certain Vladimir Putin. Coincidence? I think not.

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    1. In Britain the term WEED refers to a weak and puny man. President Putin is I think a bit paranoid about looking powerful at all costs. So to say he looks like a weed may upset him hugely. However how do you stop tumble weed looking like President Putin, it is a real problem.

      I have seen Puffins but never near a world leader or tumble weed so I do see the point about coincidence and agree.

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  4. I think a good sounding English name for an albatross would be Albert Ross.

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    1. If we eat the Albatross we could call it Diana Ross (sorry I mean Diner Ross).

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