Wednesday 27 November 2013

The Theory of Shrinking Matter and the Solution of the Universe and Dark Energy.

The Ghost Writer was in his office today although he says it was very odd because there was almost no one there and because the entire IT system was working as it should there was also not a lot to do. Of course most chaps would go home and tell their wife that it was a terrible day and they have been up to their eyes in mud and heavy spiky things all day without a single break, not go home and say HA HAH HAH HAH Hah ha hah ah hahha ha ha  did absolutely nothing today. Well as it happens he did answer the door to the public and smile at them and pretend to be the buildings maintenance man fixing widows (sorry windows) and ceiling lights, but he is rubbish at all of those.

I was having a fairly quite time myself our cyber-school has been very quite of late what with it being the pre winter period where everyone is watching everyone else waiting for someone to crack and start making festive things or offering to play the lead in this years pantomime  . . Father Christmas was a Zombie . . . . A choice which the headmaster said was quite frankly, a no brainer HA HAHH HAH AH HAH HAH HA HAH Hah ahha hah ha hah ah hah ah ah hah ah hah ah ha h ha HO HO HO.



Anyway while in science the whole concept of the universe came up in conversation with someone asking about the fact it is expanding and therefore must expand into something else. Then someone said they thought that it was getting smaller, it then stuck me in a flash of shear genius (I think I have pointed out previously that I am a rather modest genius) that the two things are in fact related. It is a complex theory but put in short goes a bit like this

Atoms are 99% empty space as they use their energy up they shrink, as every physical thing in the universe shrinks at the same uniform rate the fact they are shrinking in not obvious. So on earth, the planet, plants, life, water and everything in fact is shrinking but of course to us it all looks the same. However the space the universe is in remains the same so to us the planets appear to be getting further away because they are smaller when in fact they remain in the same place.


But what about the speed of light I hear you type, well light is made of atoms and they are getting smaller so the speed of light may appear to us to be the same but it is in fact getting slower and so planets are getting further away even in terms of radio and light speeds thus to science the universe is expanding when it is has in fact always been the same size. This explains the so called Red Shift seen in the universe and the lost energy of each atom as it shrinks explains Dark Energy . . . . . . . I think someone really should give me a Nobel prize (again) for a theory of such cunning genius that solves everything…..

6 comments:

  1. Hahaha, that is funny that you mentioned shrinking matter, because I had a young man at the tire store trying eXplain why my tires could be a little underinflated due to the cold weather, when actuaLLy they have slow leaks and need a repair. But I thought it was cute when he used the phrase, "when the molecules of oxygenin the air get cold they shrink." - of course he doesn't realize he is talking to a chemist. In a way they do slow down in their movement with a drop in thermal energy, but the idea of a shrinking molecule made me chuckle.

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    1. I think he may be right Mr ESB but if he tells it to you again you can say you are TIRED of hearing this theory and he needs to TREAD more carefully

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  2. *sigh* everything in the universe is getting smaller except my waistline...

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    1. AH at last a universal reference line that we can use to measure everything. I think science needs your waistline. It even has the right name as it will tell us how much of the matter in the universe has wasted away.

      oooooo I dont wish to worry you but we may need to put you in liquid Nitrogen in order to preserve your waistline at the agreed international standard.

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  3. This explains why wagon wheels seem to be so much smaller these days. I swear they used to be huge.

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    1. I remember huge wagon wheels Miss Laura and mars bars. However I suspect it may be all a little more to do with the grinding wheels of the corporate machine trying to convince us they are nice and would never dream of making loads of money at the public's expense.

      I am sure you are far to nice to swear.

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