Thursday 31 October 2013

The Greatest Knitting Based Halloween Horror Story of all Time....

Once upon a time, in a smallish town in the heart of the big forest lived a little old lady, she lived in a funny rickety house near the forest edge pottering about in her garden and knitting. She was a very quiet little old lady who wore a big black knitted witch’s hat. She would always smile at passers by say hello and then continue to potter about in her lovely quaint garden which was full of strange little knitted cats and dogs and crows and butterflies and all sorts of things which seemed to move about almost every day to a new spot in the garden.



But come the evening of Halloween each year she would put scary life-sized knitted children in her garden that would make odd little squeaks and whines and jiggle about. They were very very scary looking knitted children, so scary that none of the children in the town would go trick or treating at the little old ladies house because they were frightened of the scary looking knitted children that squeaked and jiggled all night long. Then in the morning as the sun rose, all the knitted children were put away again in a large shed with a big padlock at the bottom of her garden until Halloween the following year.  

Then one year a small group of children who were dressed up particularly scarily thought to themselves . . . . . .We are very very very scary, even more scary that the knitted scary children in the garden of the little old lady, so they decided that they would go and see her and shout trick or treat. They knew she would be surprised and were hoping that their very very very scary costumes would frighten the little old lady and they would get a really good treat.

So as it got dark the children sneaked into the garden and up the path towards the front door past the knitted children who squealed and jiggled and made lots of strange little noises. Then as they were about to run off in fright the front door opened and the little old lady smiled and said Ooooooooooo trick or treaters . . . . . Would you like a treat and the children all shouted Yes. But to get their treat the children had to pull a long loose thread from the nose of each or the knitted children. As the children pulled and pulled the threads, the knitted children squealed and jiggled even more until they were just a huge pile of wool on the ground and the sound of the squeals vanished into the wind.  In the middle of each pile of wool however was a large box of candy sweets, the children cheered and ate them, but it made them feel very sleepy and before they knew it they were all snoring. 

  

The following morning as the sun rose the people of the town were out franticly hunting for a small group of children who had all vanished. This had happened in the past a long long long time ago apparently; once during a previous Halloween all those years ago a small group of children had all vanished never to be seen again, but it was so long ago it was now just an old fairy tale that folk would tell on Halloween.

As the towns people rushed about they stopped to ask the little old lady if she had seen the children, she shook her head pointing at the knitted children and said I am just putting my knitted children back in my shed. The knitted children squealed and squeaked and jiggled at the town’s people, who thought they looked even more scary than normal and also strangely familiar, but they turned to continue their frantic hunt for their own children.


They searched and searched but no matter how hard they hunted they never found their children ever again. And as the little old lady put the knitted children into the shed she looked at their little eyes blinking with fear and smiled and said I DO like a good trick; before going back inside to sit and knit, and spend all day laughing hysterically with a slightly mad glint in her eye, while stroking a large knitted black cat that almost seemed to purr . . . . . . . 

9 comments:

  1. This is great, very original and perfect for Halloween! Silly children, they should know better!

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    1. Thank you Miss Laura you are very kind, and the children were indeed silly or as we might say here in Britain . . . . . . . knits . . .

      HAH HAH HAH HAH HAHHAhah ah hah ah ha ha ha ha ha

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  2. Human Rob,

    This was an excellent and very freaky story. I'm most impressed. I would say that the story of those inquisitive kids had me in stitches.

    Happy Howloween!

    Penny the Jack Russell dog and modest internet superstar! :)

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    1. I am glad folk have liked it, well those who have read it which is not a huge number.

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  3. This is the most disturbing thing I've read over Halloween. Good job!

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    1. Thanks Mr Addman.

      As it happens the most disturbing thing I have read over Halloween is a strange request for a drawing of President Putin, his twin wrestling partner fighting a grisly bear and a cheap plastic Transformer......

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  4. I have lost a follower, I can only assume I have offended a hardcore knitter (No I don't mean someone who knits hardcore as in rubble).

    DAMN.......

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  5. Replies
    1. Oooooo Hello . . . . .. Many thanks, and thanks for following . . . . It is always good to see someone new.

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