Tuesday, 24 September 2013
The Correct Date for the End of the World based on apples and science . . . . . .
After yesterday’s lesson on the wonders of the universe the Ghost Writer ruined everything by putting another apple on my apple tower to make it six apples high, all I can say is that it must predict the next possible End of the World. It has been some time since we had a decent End of the World prediction date in fact the whole End of the World prediction business has sort of Ended. I wonder if someone predicted the End of the Worlds, End of the World predict business, anyway I can start it up again now after the shock news of an apple tower taller than five apples. Even Isaac Newt-man stated that an apple will always fall at a fixed rate even if it was a largish apple up to a point (note the up to a point). You see he knew that if the apple was so large that the planet Earth was proportionally the size of an apple in comparison to the huge apple, then Earth would fall onto the apple with the same force as the small apple falls to Earth. However the small apple and Earth would both fall onto the surface of the hypothetically huge apple at the same speed, presenting the paradox that a six apple tower represents. Clearly predicting the End of the World.
So after telling everyone at school this morning that the End of the World was due in twenty five minutes it was decided that there was little point in having any maths homework. As it happens after recalculating the time and date of the End of the World, I had not thought about the diameter of the apple and its effect on Pi (HAH HAHAHH AHH AHhah ha hah ah ahha ha hahh hah ahah h hah ha) I have worked out it will now be the 1st Feb 3456 approximately when Earth will be destroyed by terrible mutant Zombies who will look just like Granny Smith.
Zombies will call this their deliciously golden era although it too will eventually crumble……