Tuesday 25 June 2013

Large guns and small leaves


The day started quietly enough with the Ghost Writer skulking about helping me screw screws into wooden posts as part of the great master plan (that’s the Moroccan Patio Master Plan or MP squared as it is known in GCHQ). We were using the powers of geometry and string to ensure everything was aligned, square and parallel much like the ancient Egyptians did or the Inca’s. It is amazing what you can do with string, in fact it is far more practical than say an ipad or the like, and come the end of the world it would make far greater sense to grab a large ball of string than some fancy phone.

OK there we were and all was fairly peaceful until there was a huge noise like a cannon going off which sent all the geese, chickens and dogs behind us off into a state of panic for ten minutes, it was a very load noise. I have since discovered though that the old chap just up the road a couple of doors away in the village who is over ninety, a bit frail, and has rubbish eye site had taken a shot at a rabbit. He had told our neighbour, who thought he was planning to shot it with an air gun, but it turned out to be something similar to an anti tank mortar weapon which he has had for many many years and he last used against an Alien spacecraft back in the 1950’s. It appears that even though his eye sight is not what is was thirty years ago, he did get the rabbit, well I think the rabbit quite frankly stood no chance or for that matter anything within a hundred yards of the rabbit. Still you know what life in the country is like.



Then after that as me and the Ghost Writer we having a cup of tea and recovering our wits watching bits of fur drift by on the wind the Ghost Writer got a call to say the power had been restored to the grey office so he had to run off to power up the old faithful server. He said later that there was another very very old chap on the road who was driving at 10MPH until you tried to overtake him then he would speed up making him impossible to pass and what he (the Ghost Writer) really needed was a an anti tank mortar weapon. 

I then had to go and do my bit with small over enthusiastic children in the local junior school teaching then Art where I just about got them to make a tree full of leaves to cover the tree on the Animal-Scope, but they are rather a lively bunch and far too enthusiastic with  all their ARE WE THERE YET .. . . . . . . plus the odd muttering of I’M BORED MAKING LEAVES, I did explain that posh leaves take time not two seconds but apparently to the small young mind two seconds is loads of time; what I needed was an anti tank mortar weapon to focus their minds.  Then Mrs Judith the Headmaster ran off smiling which seemed a bit unfair leaving me with a whole gang of pesky kids and a pile of paper leaves that they thought they would run through. Folk cant resist piles of leaves even paper ones.


OOooooooo one last thing I took a slightly better picture of the moon last night. . . .An Almost Super Moon. 

9 comments:

  1. I have taken youR advice and thrown away my iPad. I marched across town bought some string then coated it with silicon and programmeD in a veRy simple yet slow computer system, but poweRful enough to run a browser using string theory in the main OS. String Theory, hahahahahahaha, I caLL it the jPacl. You stiLL pronounce it "iPad" even though the letters are slightly different .... now resuming reading your blog post

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    1. I am sure I could make interesting comments about String theory and whether of Knot it is the right Line to follow. Or as some have said it is just a bit Woolly,

      Anyway come the end of the world you will not regret having some string with you.

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    2. I need to make a string thermometer. It reached 40 C here today and maybe reach 41 tomorrow. I switched my iPhone over to "UK" settings to do the F->C conversion for, and that works fine BUT, it stiLL as tomorrow's forecast as 106 F in weather system text message on the screen, so errrr, programming failure, or maybe Strung Failure Malfunction. Oh, to be Amish a gain. My HVAC unit failed so Cooper and I moved to the spare house. We are right in the middle of instaLLing a large central unit, but getting delays from the man who makes electrons flow in copper strings. At least we are cool at the moment.

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    3. 41c now that is hot Mr ESB . .. . . . . Britain never gets that hot say 90F is about it at best, but maybe 75 to 80F is hot over here. More like 70F at present so you can see air conditioning is less critical to us Brits.

      Stay Cool , , , , , :)

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  2. Heehee, I don't know why it amuses me greatly, to think of you using an anti tank mortar weapon to get the kids to focus their minds. Think I might try to obtain one to use against The Lil man...but for very different reasons. :)

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    1. It certainly sounded like one is was very very very loud indeed. . . . . These county folk have things in sheds that would scare even GCHQ. . . .

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  3. Oh Rob, you and your anti tank mortar weapons.

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    1. Well as I said to Miss Lily it was loud seriously loud and the result was a seriously dead rabbit. So more rabbit stew than pie I think.

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  4. I thought I had read this before... I'm sure i even commented on it as well.

    This is quiet the odd moment im having here.

    ooooh... I think i need a cup of tea. (custard creams wouldn't go a miss either).

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