Tuesday 4 June 2013

Aliens, interesting geometric shapes and large green monsters

Being a pupil; head boy as it happens (as you should all know) at a post modernist cyber-Academy somewhere in cyberspace, has certain advantages to that of a traditional school. You see on a hot sunny summer’s day when the students, and teachers for that matter are ambling about aimlessly bumping into one another and accidently sawing cats in half in the woodwork class, the health and safely officer can send everyone home on the spur of the moment. . . . So he did, on the grounds that he fancied a nice chilled day, I think more schools need to think like this it is great for student and teacher morale and a sunny day helps intelligence, (a well know fact).



At home I decided that it was time to attack and destroy three monsters in the garden three large green monsters known to all as The Three Bishops. These three monsters have been staring at us for some time now biding their time waiting for a loss of concentration so that they could pounce. Now none of us have got it in for Bishops in particular, but even a Bishop can be in the wrong place and so out came the chainsaw and I chopped then up and will burn the Bishops in the next few days. It is not everyone who gets to set fire to a Bishop.



In other news it appears that while I was busy doing battle chopping the arms and legs off Bishops aliens had left a sign in the fields to the side and behind us in the grass. Creating interesting geometric shapes which Mr Jones insists are telling him they wish make contact with the government and that we should phone the prime Minister and get him here pronto. He would of course do it himself but apparently they have blocked his phone and told him rather unfairly that he is a raving IDIOT, OK he might be a little over enthusiastic but not a raving IDIOT. And you can’t deny we have a field full of interesting geometric shapes suddenly turned up today out of nowhere.




Oooooo yes if anyone is wondering where the dog is at present he is on a sabbatical; being large and from the South American Jungle with red eyes and also fluent in Latin he felt he needed to go and chat to the Pope and advise him on stuff; and maybe nibble the odd saints bones to authenticate them.

Since dad reset the weather machine after the issue with the Big Red Button, the weather has been hunky dory here, I might press it again if things go down hill

16 comments:

  1. I don't think it aliens that left those interesting shapes. I think it might be magic or to be more pricise - a magical tractor.

    I saw a magical tractor once... wait for it... it went down the road and TURNED into a field. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAAHHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHA.. sorry.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Now look here Mr H here I am trying to put some scientific evidence together to help the pro aliens are hiding in my Wheelie bin lobby and you go and mention magic tractors. . . . . really its a rum do if you ask me.

      Oooooo on the subject of wheelie bins they would be the perfect disguise for the new Tardis. they are all over the place and never get a second look.

      Keep Watching the Skies (Not Tractors).

      Delete
    2. I would use a wheelie bin but due the fact the council stole mine last month it could put a spanner in the works for the production office if it happened again!

      Delete
  2. What manner of witchcraft is this, I ask thee??
    And I was wondering what had happened to the dog. :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yes the dog who is after all several hundred years old was a whole film in his own right. So has gone walkabout until the rest of us have run out of stuff to write about.

      I am not clever enough to hold a tale together with everyone in, and to record everyone's day would be hundreds of words a day.

      Delete
  3. If a red button keeps the weather decent, then please, please, please keep on pushing. I could fall asleep staring at your photos :)

    Right then, what did I just read? Time to go dance with the unicorns.....

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Dancing with unicorns is not something I have done, although I have juggled with acorns. I say juggled I really mean dropped them on the floor.

      Delete
  4. Wonderful read , I always leave your post until last so I can end the day with a smile.

    Loved the garden by the way.
    Yvonne.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. The garden has much work to be done on it we have plans for a posh Moroccan courtyard. Although not having any money I have to do all the work myself.

      I am glad you are still enjoying the blog.

      Delete
  5. Do think aliens wiLL ever start using algebraic shapes instead of geometric? I was reaLLy eXpecting some equations by now ...

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I am sure there are many very clever aliens but we are all just too far apart.

      The ones who do find us are in fact just scribbling maps trying to work out how to get back on the intergalactic super highway, they then leave them to amuse all the bald apes that keep running about fighting.

      Delete
    2. Maybe they don't even notice us and they use the earth for sculpture. Perhaps Earth may one day be a child alien's art project on a gigantic refrigerator door somewhere (turn your head left 13 degrees right and then look up 5 degrees) over there millions of light years in front of you. Joke: What brand of refrigerator do aliens buy?




      Answer: AnETa instead of an A-man-a


      Hahahahahahahahahahahaahahahahahahahah a.

      Delete
    3. They buy then in Comet . . . . . OK Comet went bust and ruined that joke.

      I am happy to be sculpture, part of a famous Michael-alien-joe

      Delete
  6. Do NOT press the red button! If I've learned anything from movies its that red buttons always cause explosions, and I don't fancy any explosive weather right now. A nuclear winter in the middle of summer is simply not on.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. What you mean this Red Button Mr Addman . . . . . . . . . .AH DAMN, sorry about that.

      Delete