Thursday 21 February 2013

The Blindfold, the Sawdust and the Mug of Tea


Today involved leaping into action, not easy when it is freezing cold outside, but I managed it sort of. I was then transported to another location having been blindfolded by dad who said it was a request by members of the family who were worried I might go and visit them on my own if I knew where the lived.  Normally I might complain about this but as they are close relatives I guess it is OK? Once there I was pointed at a large hole, no not in the ground but in a row of kitchen units and was told I was the ideal person to build two shelves to support loads of stuff and that I did not need to worry to much about the quality of it as long as it was perfect, and blended in like part of the original kitchen. I was then told I could take as long as I like as long as it was finished before it got dark and that I would not be allowed any food or drink until it was done, and I had been blindfolded again and returned home.  But as I have said they are close relatives so its OK.



As it happened it was rather a big task so I was very busy and made huge clouds of sawdust as I cut all the bits of wood up to fit into the space, dad who was watching me work as he chatted to the family said when I have mastered woodwork like he did many moons ago I will be able to do all this without creating huge mounds of sawdust but he said on this occasion he would let me off as he had forgotten to remove the blindfold.  I must admit it was much easier without the blindfold but I thought it might be like one of those military things where they have to take their guns apart in the dark and then reassemble it only to discover they have accidently shot everyone, I’m sure making shelves blindfolded in harder..

I did ask dad if he had remembered the spirit level but he said I could have a glass of wine when I was older but I would have to make do with a mug of tea for now, a mug of tea is not the most accurate spirit level in the world but sort of works OK, but you then end up with a mug of tea full of sawdust, lumpy tea is not all that nice. . . . .YUCK


Finally about five o’clock I finished the job; was then blindfolded and brought home by dad so I could eat food, I was hoping to see Miss E while I was there but she remained hidden under a duvet and refused to come out saying it was noisy and the world was full of sawdust, apparently she has created a new world under her duvet and has proclaimed herself queen and has not been seen as such for three days.  So that’s it another busy day of useful work, this half term is terrible so far I appear to have done nothing but be useful and productive, and my diary is turning into an IDIOTS guide to DIY . . . . . . . I don’t think Steven Spielberg is going to make a DIY movie about shelves and muddy holes yet……  


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9 comments:

  1. Hilarious and I have only read the first half of a pair of paragraphs.

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    1. I wiLL now go play in the snow. And by play in the snow, I mean that I wiLL walk in the snow, then drive to the diner to see if Jesus is working. I may possibly stay and eat even if he is not there.

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    2. I was rather hoping all the snow had vanished from the UK but there is talk of some on Saturday. This is not good as we are all off the the other side of Britain on Saturday to a birthday party of an old friend who is sixty. It will mean that I will not be able to write a diary entry on Saturday and our house will be occupied by another member of our family who will be enjoying not having any of us here

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    3. This comment has been removed by the author.

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    4. I tried to leave a comment earlier, but I ran into a strange bubble problem when I tried to push the Publish button. I am not sure what is causing it, whether it is related to my iPad, or blogger, or possibly something with the code in your blog template. It happens sporadicaLLy and I am not sure if it is just the comments for your blog. Very puzzling.

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  2. I imagine it would be quite hard to do DIY in a blindfold. I can't do it at the best of times.

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    1. I am good at DIY but not that good when blindfolded. I think being an artist means DIY is within the same skill range. although I also use a lot of artist licence in my DIY

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  3. My attempts at DIY look as if I have been wearing a blindfold, when infact I have not. I'm not even allowed near a paintbrush without written consent from Mrs H.

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    1. I have always been something of a natural with DIY jobs, my weakness is getting a little carried away and adding swirly bits and carved heads to things but then getting bored before I finish, so that I end up with lots of rather fancy unfinished DIY projects that are as I'm told unpractical and no use . . . . . . .DAMN

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