Monday 17 September 2012

Missing one zombie responds to the name of George (sort of), might be near Poundland


Monday and back to school, sometimes that happens faster than I think it is meant too, and by the look of most of the pupils on the bus I would say they all agree it was like a bus load of zombies after a night out scarring (sorry scaring or both) folk. In fact several little old ladies did scream as we passed Pound-land a shop full of exciting things for a pound, and little old ladies battling for a bargain in the two for one everything must go bargain bin.  As far as we could tell, as we passed on the bus,  bearing in mind there were several little old ladies screaming and running about pointing at us shouting ZOMBIES (this all sounds a bit familiar), the purple rinse economy nylon fashion wigs were very popular.  Anyway as we all got off the school bus in the car park I noticed someone looking very confused and still sitting on the back seat of the bus trying to eat a pencil.

It appears that he had seen all these zombies getting on the school bus and so just sort of followed along because that is what zombies do apparently. They are a bit like sheep in that respect, go with the flow no radical thinking with zombies, but it means that we had a real zombie in school today WELL COOL……



Luckily with it being Monday none of the teachers noticed he was a zombie and just thought he was yet another new pupil, even when the headmaster asked him if he was OK and he (the Zombie) said MMMMMMmmmm TReeeeeee GRRUUUUUU AAUUuuuGHHHHH, the headmaster just said FINE… GOOD STUFF OFF TO CLASS NOW.   He even got an A+ for his dissection of a frog in biology, although he was then told off for eating it and biting the biology teacher’s hand. I was going to tell the biology teacher that they might turn into a zombie but thought better of it.

We would all end up in quarantine and some mad doctor would try and jab us all with big needles or worse so after an uneventful day at the school (AGAIN) I got George the Zombie I thought it best to call him something, back on the bus, I think he quiet enjoyed it really, I am sure the headmaster would be very pleased about that.

However I was distracted half way home by a huge gang of little old ladies with weird pink hair marching up the high street towards the corner tea shop and shouting at innocent passers by to get out the way because they were frail little old ladies scared witless by huge horrible mutant zombie children. Then when I got off the bus I noticed the George the Zombie was missing which is very annoying, I was planning to take him home and show dad what I had found on the bus. Mum has made me put posters up now on all the trees and shop windows saying MISSING George the Zombie.

 I was unable to find a suitable picture of a zombie for the posters so have dressed the chicken up to look like one…….. sort of ….. Mum said IDIOT….


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11 comments:

  1. Zombies don't catch buses. And a shop full of exciting things for a pound is a great slogan for Poundland.

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    1. Do you think that poundland might pay me for the slogan I could sell it to them for a pound, that would be super cool.

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    2. Are you sure about Zombies on buses, I think I have seen a few now.

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  2. No need to warn your teacher. As a biology teacher, he should already be aware of the dangers of a zombie bite.

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  3. Ask for two pounds to confuse them.
    You may be right about zombies on public transport.

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    1. Not sure I will get two pounds they may think of this as a pound to far.

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  4. Okay, I'm concerned about your local zomboids after reading just the first sentence. The second to the last word of the sentence is "scarred", that the zombies had been out scarring folks. I thought, wow, its bad enough to be out scaring people, but giving them scars, why, that just seems a bit much, or should I say "a bite much"? Okay, now on to sentence two ...

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    1. Well spotted Mr ESB .. . . . . Its sort of cool to have a proof reader on my blog. I will never become rich and famous if I keep making silly mistakes.

      I will put this right, right now...

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    2. I am not sure about that statement, there are lotza people who make money entertaining by mistakes, do you remember a comedian from a long time ago named Norm Crosby? And there is Yogi Berra, too. So keep up the good work of interesting miss steaks. They are both old and someone needs to take their place eventuaLLy. I think that means you would have to move to New York.

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    3. Ooooooo I think I may prefer to remain very much in the rolling hills of the British countryside. Although I bet New York can be very exciting.

      Between you and me I am happy not having money, but I think I may just about have enough to be happy.

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