Monday, 13 February 2012
David Attenborough and the Mountain Gorillas + Eskimos and white snow
I went and waited for the school bus this morning as you do, only after a while of it not turning up, I returned home to be told it was the half term holiday. I do wish everyone would tell me before I go and wait for the bus, and Mum always says IDIOT when I get home. We also had to play scissors, paper, stone again to see who was going to paint the kitchen unit doors. And as most will know by now I lost (again). The plan was to paint them all raspberry coloured but we are on plan B now which is to paint the wall units white and the base unit’s raspberry.
So I have been painting wall units white. We never really do white in our house because it is too white (just to clarify that white is too white, the house is not white), and we don’t really do nearly white or the so called shades of white that paint companies say are very exciting. Normally I would say that paint companies are IDIOTS to say there are shades of white but Eskimos have loads of words for white as they do for snow, so they would know about stuff like that. What does go through my mind though is if they do have loads of words for snow and white a translation of a long Eskimo conversation into English might end up as White white white white snow white snow snow snow white white white white snow snow snow seal snow snow white white white white white snow white snow snow snow white white snow snow snow snow white and the seven dwarf seals AH HA ahh ah hahah ahhah hah hahha hahh hahhha ha ha ha ha hah hah hahahh hah ……….. WHITE MAN PAINTS all rooms in his house white …. IDIOT.
I have stopped painting now, to tell the truth logically that is rather simple to deduce because I am writing my diary. I had planned to go and explore with the dog along the side of the fabled Minor Stream of In-consequence but it is rather cold and drizzly so I haven’t.
I am being watched as I am writing this but this time I can prove it as luckily I have the camera to hand although I do need to take the picture through the double glazing. Something most wildlife photographers don’t have a problem with. You seldom see that David Attenborough whispering next to a UPVC double glazing unit discussing the Mountain Gorillas squeegee technique (YUK).
Luckily he is safe now as shooting season is over.