Tuesday, 24 January 2012
How to saw a lady in half and several hundred men in suits surrounded by sofa's
Different days bring different things, as we all know and today brought the image of several hundred men in suits surrounded by rather uninteresting brown leather sofa’s and small nests of tables made of oak. Now some of you might be going WHAT? But it is true, alas for you the readers though I will not tell you why I was in such a situation, it will remain a small mystery in the great master plan of life. And to be blunt about it, it is more interesting as a mystery.
This is worth remembering; sometimes mysteries are far more mysterious if they remain a mystery. A bit like the sawing a lady in half, the old magic trick of many a magician back in the days of small theatres and sending children up chimneys. Once you know how the trick is done it is not the same. I worked out the sawing the lady in half trick a long time ago, it is dead easy you use identical twins. I really impressed the school a couple of years ago when I did that trick on stage although it would have been better if the second identical twin had not burst into tears and run off stage. And then the caretaker made me mop up the stage afterwards and it took ages. The headmaster then banned identical twins and made me write out a thousand times I must not saw identical twins in half. I did explain I was only sawing the one in half but as he pointed out once you saw one of them in half they are not identical any longer which is true. (I have got a feeling I wrote all this in book one…so sorry about that if you remember. We can cut it out later HA HAH AH AH hahaha hahah hahah hah hahhah hahah hahhahah hahah ah ha).
Finally good news I have finally got the two ends of the painting edges in the hallway to meet so that is all the hallway edges done and it is just a case of filling the huge space in between with paint and all will be Hunky Dory and Tickety Boo. That was always the problem with sawing the lady in half getting the two halfs to meet again, they tend to slip about a bit YUK.